Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Tuesday? Time for tremendous typing!

Tuesday is apparently time for typing with alliteration, which is today's topic in the "Month of Writing"....which I have effectively written...uh, 12 days.

I understand MySpace. It is simple:
Private or Public?
Whore or Art girl?
Easy blogging.
Easy Bulletins.
Oh, and 320 something friends of mine in Austin are on my "list".
My Dad is on it.

Facebook is another animal. It's confounding:
No blogs.
Apps? What are Apps?

Today I added the first of several HS folks from CT. It's really odd. I have had such a full life since then...almost 20 years ago.

Hmmm....that's all I got right now. I should mull.


Monday, November 17, 2008

This weekend proved to be a very busy one, and one that kept me away from the computer. There is something very grounding about getting outside for the whole weekend…especially two weekends in a row. I think at this point my cellular cohesion is from sunscreen.

I have 4 topics to catch up with for this month of writing:

1. What is the difference between a good reader and a good writer?
Hmmmm…..this is interesting to me. Writing is definitely a skill that can be learned as far as technicals, but having the ability to have a voice heard in that writing is a gift. I don’t know how many times I have seen one of those 1 panel cartoons where the artist could not get the characters to look the same week to week. However, if the artist can master the toon then you can see it’s personality and growth…much like in writing. For instance…I think I can hear Sedaris smile in his writing.

Good reading is something different all together….and I don’t feel like writing about it now.

2. Recycling….write about something you wish you could recycle.
That’s easy. My relationship with my best friend from HS. It’s happening now, and we are both very pleased about it.

3. Time stamp of your day. I don’t wanna.

4. Write a fake Craigslist ad:
Let’s see…………

“Liquid Fetishist seeks housemate…will provide kit!”

Are you tired of living with boring roommates who don’t understand your deep-seated need to be “involved” with liquids? Do your current roommates constantly harass you about that “draining sound” coming from your room…or the basement? Not enough storage for jars?
How about your out of date grippers? New ones are soooo expensive…and why not share!
And let’s not talk about the odor…

If this sounds like you, then you need to move in with me. I will provide the following:

Antique Trough

Industrial Gloves

Rendering Jars…old and new!
And of course…a new gripper! (that’s the best part)

Here is the apartment….please excuse the mess….I was in a hurry to post this after my pooh bear left me. Call me now!!!! I’ll keep the stove hot!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

I like today's topic!

Laurie has suggested an interesting one for today.

Write about Process Analysis...

Good Process Analysis:
• Either helps readers perform the steps themselves or helps them understand how something works
• Presents the essential steps in a process
• Explains steps in detail
• Presents steps in logical order (usually time order - chronological)

So...in true monkey-style, I'm not going to do the topic "quite" that way....instead, I am going to list the titles of Process Analyses that would be interesting is flushed out...

1. The standard pattern of Susanna's dating habits...starting with saying, "I met this awesome guy!!!! He's totally perfect. Nerdy, a musician, science background, a bit of an ass, lot's of redflags....Perfect!"

2. The order of a standard night that ends up at Elysium, despite everyone saying, "I'm NOT going there tonight!!!!"

3. The seven steps that move from playing DDR at the arcade and end up with you in gold lame leggings from American Apparel....drinking pear Grey Goose and soda at the Beauty Bar, doing Coke off of some chick's sweaty ass in the Loo. "Oh no!!!! I've made a Roux!"

4. The long and solid road towards the procurement of illegal cheese, and the follow-up steps at the DR. office.

5. 13 Sure Fire steps to get a mouth sore at Flamingo Cantina (may be shortened to 2 steps if necessary).

6. How to sneak new shoes from DSW into the house....under the radar.

7. 6 great steps to end up with permanent maker on your face...see #5 to combine steps.

8. How to throw your back out masturbating....best done in 32 elaborate steps, however may been done in one step.

He he he....I'm cracking myself up!

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

My life as an elite jerk!

Today's Topic:
Think back to a word or phrase that you may have misheard as a child.


I don't think that I really misheard phrases, largely because language was very clear from my folks and their pack of Rhetoric professor friends.

What I did not understand however were certain social situations and decorum. For instance, my Mother tells this story of when I was 4 and we went to dinner at someone's house. When we sat down at the table, I leaned over to Mom with a look of horror on my face and said,
"Mommy....they gave us PAPER napkins!!!!"

I also remember thinking that it was VERY wrong to not use saucers with your cup....and that everyone polishes the silver at least once a month right?

On the flip side...I never understood families that lived in squalor...hand to mouth...that bought luxury cars or pure-bred dogs. When I moved from CT to TX, high school in Round Rock was the first place I ever saw someone who lived in a trailer carry a $200 purse. It is truly beyond me.

Paper napkins.......the horror!!!!!!!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

4 Days of Awesome

I lost my free Internet that I was stealing from my neighbor….I guess I’ll HAVE to pay for it now. That is my excuse for the lapse in writing.


Saturday’s Topic was to write about my name:

I got my name after weeks of being “Baby Girl Sustare”…and grandma Suzette said it was no good. So I got a derivative form of her name. I feel that it is leagues better than the name my folks had ready..Mikalia Dawn Sustare…hippie name, yuck. The boy name was great…Michael Alexander Sustare…they should have done it anyhow. I could have been a girl named Mike.

Sunday’s Topic was to come up with a Trivial Pursuit card that is about me:

I don’t want to ….I hate that game…in fact, I loathe trivia games in general. I’m not sure why. For the most part I am jam packed full of facts, but for some reason the kind of facts that are not in those games. I mean, go ahead and ask me the eating habits of the Pangolin….or about the history of miniature furniture making. I mean, who the hell is Mack Brown? Is that a new eyeshadow color?

Monday’s Topic was to pick a color and write on it:

I choose mint green. Currently I am baffled by the usage of this color in homes and residences, because the only thing that I can think of is the cinderblock walled basement in the Potsdam, NY civic center.

The civic center was the basement of the history museum and was connected to the library…a spot that hosted many local events. I think it was the combination of the Terrazzo floors, the reek of generic PineSol and the ochre color from said PineSol that crept up the walls about a foot, that turned my stomach. That color for me will always be connected to sad/poor wedding receptions that had homemade wedding cakes…leaning to one side as if to be running from the altar.

That minty green also did not accept shadows well, which always made rooms look flat and unnerving. No sir…I don’t like it.

Today’s Topic is to pick a picture and write a 1000 words on it:

Well, seeing as how I am condensing 4 days into one, do you think I’m going to do that? Shit no! In fact you are lucky if I hit 500 today.
Here is my picture…

Godspeed Major Cooper....and Happy Veterans day to all that have survived the service. I miss you very much today sugar...

Friday, November 7, 2008

Today's topic...fav bar!

I don't have much time, so here goes!

My top haunt is definitely Casino El Camino. Brad and I went there for the Tuesday election coverage where I had this exchange with Lifto, of the Jim Rose Circus fame.

"Hey, how you been"-sus
"good good"-lifto
"Your hair is looking good!"-sus
"Thanks! Your boobs are looking good!"-Lifto

He he he....

I'm doing a crap job keeping up....

Craptastic....I'll get better with this 30 day challenge. The month of no drinking was easier (no it wasn't).

So I missed yesterday's topic, which was to write about a favorite song of mine. I thought about it for a while.

Back in the early 80's I have such a vivid memory of this Chanel commercial

As a kid, I found it so glamorous...and dark, like Brazil dark. Although there is nothing too Distopia about it, I still got that feeling. The song stuck with me and later I looked it up and learned it. I think the last time I sang it was to Ilse a few weeks ago. Ahhhhh....the era when all music sounded like it was coming out of a tin can.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

monkey in a blisspile!

Well, I could not be more tickled today....for many reasons! Happy happy girl here!

The election fever makes me think about my folks' experience last weekend, which I will share.

The Blanton was having a symposium for members that was on counterculture during the 50's and 60's, which my parents were part of. All in all, the experience was a mixed experience for them.

The first speaker was Dean Fleming, one of the original founders of the Park Place Gallery Group, famous for being a big part of the Avant Garde movement. Dennis and Judy said that his speech was riveting. Unfortunately, the rest of the speeches were crap....so much so, that apparently my dad pulled out a book and started to read during one of them.

One of the guys was simply reading Wilhelm Reich and almost masturbating his pen while speaking. Another woman's laptop decided to automatically update the Vista op system during her presentation.

During one of the breaks my mother decided to go check out the new facility that is not yet open, and used the restroom in the unfinished part. Unfortunately the lock on the stall was part of the "unfinished" part....and Mom got locked in. After trying several times, she had to crawl out under the stall door.

To top off their less than stellar day, they ate at the History cafe on the balcony and had to hear a crazy woman on the street screaming, "Write me in for President!!!" for their whole meal.

My father, in typical fashion, had this quip...
"You know, it really was a shame that we got this great seat with this vantage point, and me without my crossbow."

He he he.....
Happy Obama Day!!!!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Macabre Hostess...days of wrting 3 & 4

So this writing challenge has already tripped me up...with my third day rolling into the 4th.

The topics that the Hostess gave for today and yesterday are:
"Write about your day as a serial killer"
"Write about an unusual animal going berserk and killing people".

Those weren't her words, but the gist.

I'm in too good of a mood to write on those topics....and frankly, and pleased that Halloween is over this year. Although it is one of my favorite holidays, I think I may have forgotten what it feels like to wear vinyl for 18 hours straight. It was time for a Silkwood Shower when I got home...and maybe a shot of Cipro.

Today I am exercising my right to "just write a paragraph"...as stated in said challenge's rules, however....since this is a rollover from yesterday, I will write a short something on animals later today. But I promise, my animal will NOT be on a "Mauling Spree".

Instead, my Tree Sloth will be on a "Malling Spree"...

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Day 2 - 30 Days of Write.....Haikugore

Horror inspired Haikus for the scaaaarry "Day After the Dios De Los Muertes".

I bet for some of you this is a scaaaaary day, what with the hangovers and such....or possibly waking up next to that dude from the costume party, his McCain mask and wig stuck to your ass. Even scaaaarrier would be if his phone that kept ringing this morning was that woman from the party dressed as Palin...also his wife. aaaaaaannnd....your dog watched. annnnnddd.....you didn't even wakeup with your costume on the ground (where is yours?)......and the neck rash? What the...!!!!!!!!!!!!

Order yourself a pizza and atone later today.

Horror Haikus by monkey...(a Junkie-Vampire...Pedophile Clown...Current 401K...Sad Over-the-Top Fetish Dude...Sour Grapes Guy...Homestyle Surgeon...EgoManiac

Your blood is not bland
It tastes of blue-black metal
Nectar in my gear

Damn clown makeup mess
I hope the van runs this time
Kids packed in the back

Retirement time
Seems so far away now right?
Negative numbers...

Special treat for you
Ballgag and whip custom made
Without you I fail

But I love you babe
You don't want me now so what
Your ass is too big

Your skin is like milk
This won't hurt too much hold still
Attaching my tubes

You cannot believe
The amount of pain I have
To be this awesome

Happy Sunday!

Saturday, November 1, 2008

suzy's sense of snow

Those who know me well, know that I have what can only be described as a freaky sense of smell. It is so acute that I can usually smell someone coming up behind me before I can sense them or hear them. This was not a great thing at the stinky dance party last night....but that's another story.

February 14th, 1988:
In Hartford CT an Italian dinner takes up the whole night....none of this Olive Garden "Here's Your Check With Your Entree" attitude. In fact, I had heard a waiter say, "If you have other plans tonight you may not want to eat here. Dining takes 4 hours...to take off if you are in a rush."

Dave took me to the restaurant for Valentines...new driver's license in hand. It was the first time I was able to experience the true odor of a fine Italian melange. The garlic was seeping into my skin before it even hit my fork. I believe when we left, we were intoxicated by the scent.

On the way back to my place Dave asked if I had time for a detour. Of course! We pulled into the golf course near his house, which at that time of the year was a glowing blue field of snow in the moonlight. We trudged out into the middle of this huge open space and sat in the snow.

At that point I realized I could smell Nothing...except for him. The snow had killed any scents coming my way except for the scent of Dave. As we made snow angels and kissed, I realized how connected I felt to him when my strongest sense was crippled and I could focus solely on Dave. He truly was the most bright and shiny way to start my relationship with Romance.

Kisses to you Dave. Feliz Dia De Los Muertos!

this is the day!

The first one of November. I'm just starting this blog....bland template and all. For the month of November I'll be involved with a writing group where everyone linked in will promise to write at least a paragraph a day.

That would be at 30daysofwrite.blogspot.com

Every day our hostess will post a topic which we are to write on. The folks in the group don't "have" to use the topic if they are already writing something everyday...but it's an option.

I will start mine in the next post. Happy Day of the Dead!!!!